Social Media … bitching is the new black


Social Media is the only place in the world where bitching is totally cool. People don’t want to hear about what you’ve got to say about someone else. Regardless if you think its acceptable or not, it is.

In saying that, lets talk about someone else.

On a recent trip to Sydney I caught up with a dear friend of mine who is a film producer and we were talking about the painful and never ending upkeep of social media sites. He told me to download a few apps to keep it tidy and then mentioned what the successful tweeters and face bitcher’s are doing to gain followers and friends. 70% of what you talk about should be about someone else and 30% about you. That’s it! When talking about yourself, this should only be about your experience in relation to the person or trend you are referring too. NOT what you had for lunch or the fact that you can’t sleep or the baby just ate dog food. No one cares!! They want to know who you love, who you hate and how current affairs have affected you.

I put this strategy to the test last weekend and on my Facebook page. My topic was my girlfriends UTI that she had at the time, how we self diagnosed it, how we self medicated it and what we did about it. Instant comments and PM’s came flooding in. It really works. A big tick to you Mr Film Maker for that hot tip.

That same film maker pal of mine’s example to his 70/30 rule was about a tweet he made on twitter. His re-tweets were high simply because he tweeted about a recent heatwave in Sydney and how cool he was keeping in front of the air conditioning. The money maker was his reference to the Australian bush fire news at the time and how we have nothing to whinge about whilst in the comfort of our home (that most had lost in the fires) and keeping cool in air conditioning. People connected, felt empathy and re tweeted and passed comments.

Understand? Good. Try it and let me know in comments below who you bitched about and what others said.



Communication Is Depositing A Part Of Yourself In Another Person.



Kali Holmes communication

Take advantage of every opportunity to practice your communication skills so that when important occasions arise, you will have the gift, the style, the sharpness, the clarity, and the emotions to affect other people - Jim Rohn


Network marketing is straight out communication. You must learn excellent communication skills and never stop communicating, be it through our body language, listening, the way we talk, how we present down to the clothes we wear. It is completely natural as humans to judge others, when rather we need to learn to accept and understand. It is when we fail to speak up when we feel misunderstood or don’t ask questions when we are uncertain that disaster most often strikes and we experience what is called “communication breakdown.”

Have you ever just feared confrontation in your family or work place environment so much that you let things bottle up, stew inside and suppress your feelings for the fear of being judged or confronted on the defense of the person who you are in adversity with? Are you that person that just says yes and agrees with everything and everyone for the sake of not having to enter a discussion in which you may find yourself admitting your wrongs? The two worst things you can do are not confronting the situation bothering you, and, always agreeing and saying yes when you really want to say no. The general reason most people don’t communicate how the really feel is due to  their fear of something. Fear is simply put: False Evidence Appearing Real. It is true, that most times, what we do not know makes us feel uncomfortable and no one likes to be made to feel silly or a joke of by voicing their opinion for what they already reservations towards. Therefore most people just decide to retract into their shell or go with the flow as an unconscious protective mechanism.  It is incredibly liberating to communicate assertively and confront adversity than saying  nothing at all in which anger and resentment will inevitably manifest.

“Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech that you will ever regret.” – Dr Laurence J Peter

Confrontation is not always pleasant, but it need not be unsettling either. I have found MLM, at times, to be extremely confronting (life in general as well) on so many levels. In the MLM industry, we are dealing with people everyday who have their ‘life’ aside from their business partnership with us. You need to be able to communicate and relate to all types of people from all walks of life and understand we are not all same and we all have personal issues occurring that may affect our ability to perform. There may have a couple of people in your down line who are those super charged double diamonds in the making whom you get along fabulously with and then out of nowhere adversity strikes. You don’t see eye to eye and you have a fall out. Are you going to let that adverse situation destroy your relationship and be stubborn, not listen or get frustrated because you feel they’re not building the business as fast and passionately as you are? Or are you going to look at the bigger picture, realise that curve balls are going to come flying at incredible speeds, unexpectedly constantly throughout life, and then take this in your stride to communicate well and resolve the disagreement? Adversity is a part of life that shapes us and forces us to grow. As we grow, we change, as we change we become better leaders and stronger communicators. The majority of the population fear change because it is CONFRONTING, it forces us outside of our comfort zone and until you make change your second nature, is very unsettling.

Successful network marketers are constantly in change and practicing effective communication, every single day. How one learns to effectively communicate is first by being honest with oneself  about your feelings and then compassionately delivering your thoughts from a place where you are not blaming, accusing or judging the other, simply speaking always from how YOU feel and how YOU were AFFECTED when “such and such occurred”. Starting today, to be an effective communicator by being compassionate towards others, step into their shoes and really listen to what is on their mind with the intention to resolve things in one way or another. It is far better to over communicate than to under communicate and leave negative energy lurking in your life.

“The way we communicate with ourselves and with others ultimately determines the quality of our lives.” – Anthony Robbins

Communication is the KEY to a massive business in network marketing, the sooner you understand this, learn compassion and accept people instead of judging them, the sooner you will enjoy your life of freedom that this business so generously provides.


Kali Holmes MLM "Memory Jogger".

MLM success requires you to build relationships with people that will join your network marketing business. The most is a high priority activity that you must start the minute you enroll.

A memory jogger is a list of names of people that triggers your mind who to call to tell about your new home based business. Generally we all have an extensive network of at least 500 people we can reach out to by our 20’s so the concept of the memory jogger is to remind you of them.

Never leave home without your Ipad or laptop. This ensures that as you go about your day to day activities and names pop into your mind or you meet new people you can immediately add their name, phone number and email address to your list. This is how you form your “working inventory”.

Your REAL Inventory is NOT the products or Services your company sells. It is PEOPLE. And you MUST have people (LOTS of PEOPLE) to talk to about what you are doing.
The following memory jogger (that you will form your working inventory) list that I have put together for you is available to download now here now.

From your working inventory you will then enable yourself to build your first “hot” 100 leads (at the very minimum) for your MLM Business.

One very IMPORTANT RULE in building your memory jogger, you must NEVER PRE JUDGE ANYONE. Do not leave anyone off that list because those you think will join you wont and those you think wont, will. Consider everybody, obviously looking for qualified leads and people you want to work with who will lead you to entrepreneurs or others with large networks.

There are strategies to handling objections, so NEVER ACCEPT a NO. Very rarely does a “no” actually mean “no”. I will cover objections in my next post. I will also explain how you can twofold your memory jogger through asking a “NO” for referrals and utilizing your up-line as leverage.


DOWNLOAD “MLM Memory Jogger” from the downloads section on this page.

I use an excel spread sheet to then record my prospects, but at the very least grab a pad and pen and follow the steps below. Excel is the best way to record your data base. You can draw up tables, add headings, record notes and dates of the last time you made contact etc. It pays to be detailed in how you record data from the beginning so you keep up to date notes on your prospects.

My headings would include: name, action one and date (add details of who referred if its a referral or where you know them and how you delivered the first point of contact information if its through facebook or email, action two and date (this would be your follow up notes and interest level), notes (anything at all you want to record that you think is going to be of importance to remember).  Some lists i add in email address, phone number, country/state, event invite sent etc.


Step One: Your Warm Market:
Your Spouses family and friends
Cell phone contacts
Address book
Social Media Sites eg: Facebook, Twitter, Google+

Step Two:
Any business associates you have (that you do business with) ask them for their help to build your new MLM business by giving you minimum 5 referrals.

You could say something along the lines of, “I think you would agree that I do a lot of business with you, and I need your help with my new business.”

Step Three: Read over the memory jogger and keep adding to your list and asking every person you speak with who says “no” for referrals.


MLM is a relationships business and you need to sincerely show an interest in others and form a connection and over time you will build rapport. Remember people join YOU because they trust in your ability to help them build their business. Asking questions helps you to understand the interest level of your prospects and what their underlying concerns may be, if any. With a little patience, persistence pays off. Do not be disheartened by a ‘no’, for every no you receive only leads you closer to a yes. The 80/20 rule applies here…for every 10 qualified leads you speak to, two people will be interested to join you in your business. Happy prospecting and never give up!

Building Momentum

Don’t take your pedal off the metal!

A friend of mine once told me that building momentum is like push starting a car, not really fun to begin with sometimes…. You get out, you take position behind it and start by pushing that car, its too hard, you think I’m never going to get anywhere what the hell am I doing this for?(Then you have one of those light bulb moments and remember “Oh that’s right – I’ve got places to
go, people to see, things to do!”) So you persist, and “Wow!”, persistence pays off, you get a little bit of movement and away you go…… Once the wheels are in motion it becomes easier. BUT you have to keep pushing, keep moving as the car is heavy and the minute you stop pushing that’s it. You now start over, from the very beginning! And then you find yourself again, finding the strength to get that darn car rocking, and once again, then the wheels slowly start turning and the pace increases. Its bloody hard work! (Not that I have had to push to many cars, to get them moving, that’s what men are for or mechanics and toe trucks, but I can recall one time sitting in the front seat while 4 boys were pushing behind as we tried to gather momentum to get the darn car clicking over…I thought it was OK, bet they have a different story!)

Momentum is what is required to build your business. Momentum is created by sharing your story with other people. Never pre-qualify anyone! This may involve (dare I say it….) picking up the phone and talking to someone on the end of it. You need a good source of leads to generate a steady residual income. The picking up of the phone, introducing yourself and your business, getting your story perfect and creating impact in that first 30-60 seconds is critical. Then following up. If you fail in any of these steps, leave your follow ups to long, you stop your rocking and rolling of the vehicle, you will have to start again. Every day talk to at least 10 quality leads and share your story. Then book appointments to present to groups and be time efficient. Tip: NEVER pre-qualify anyone. Those who you think will join you wont and those you think wont will! Have fun pushing your car or keep your pedal to the metal, I know what I’ll be doing!